Last time we mused about where work is going. This time we jump to the near future for a work day.
My Work Day 2060
I woke as the window blinds in my bedroom opened, threw off the covers and stood up. I would have preferred getting up later than 9:45, but my 10 o’clock meeting wasn’t going to let me sleep in. I liked the new energy I had in the morning, glad my A.I. assistant had set my serotonin pump earlier. That quick morning pulse definitely helped get me going. The FDA approving the implants for all use not just depression was killing off the alarm clock industry.
I put on my robe and walked to the kitchen my cup of coffee waiting for me. Hey, my brain still liked old school caffeine too. I walked over to my standing desk and grabbed my headphones and glasses. The you have a Teams Ultimate meeting at 10:00 (10 minutes) message flashed in corner of vision. Okay, so alarm clocks are on there way out, but we managed to create something more insidious. I flicked my hand to snooze the reminder.
I expanded my virtual monitor screen and grabbed the meeting agenda. Some of the engineering specs where their for the Tangent hoverboard. Really just an issue of tweaking the A.I. settings as far as I could tell.
My meeting reminder pinged me again. I scanned some of my avatars decided on a pair or business casual jeans and a corporate logo polo. I swiped to enter the meeting. The lights in my office nook dimmed and my glasses switched into full VR mode.
A larger ogre with a battle axe stood by a model of the hoverboard along with some engineering schematics on the whiteboard.
“Morning Yang,” I said.
The ogre set down the battle axe. “Morning,” he said. “I don’t know if we really need this meeting as far as I can tell pretty much everything is ready. Still some tweaks to the accelerometer software, but I think we should be good.”
Mohammed form legal winked in. He was dressed in some Star Trek uniform from one of the old series. What was it again? Picard I think. “So do you think you have the settings locked down?”
“I think so.” I said. “We are just down to some of the software tweaks.”
“About that,” said Mohammed. “I would like to add a legal swipe through warning about the use at high speeds.”
“Seriously,” Yang said. Picking up the battle axe and half heartedly shaking it.
“Sorry, too many stupid people out there with access to lawyers.” Mohammed replied.
“I thought they wanted to be referred to as logically challenge?” I said
Mohammed rolled his eyes.”Turned out they weren’t bright enough to make themselves a protected class.”
Bob from Health and Safety flashed in. What the hell was he wearing? Different flashes of clothing and faces continued to flash around. I raised an eyebrow. “The Scramble Suit from a Scanner Darkly. Seriously could you be more of a hipster. You know that makes it really hard to talk to you?”
“Hey, its a cult classic. How did you know it was me?” Bob asked.
“I think it would have been that large ‘Bob’ text over the head of you avatar. Seriously what’s wrong with jeans and a polo anyway.” I said.
“OK, Millennial.” Bob said. “Probably would have been better if we were meeting in Time on my Face anyway.”
“You are too much of a hipster,” Yang said. “You do know that Apple and Microsoft are pretty much the same age as companies, right? And that Apple’s corporate cloud has sucked forever. Although I could use Time on My Face’s interactivity a little right now.” He finished swinging around his battle axe..
Jonathan from accounting flashed in, wearing full Stormtrooper armour. “That’s why it is the preferred platform for porn.” He said adding to Yang’s comment.
“Fine I’ll change if you insist.” Bob said as his Scramble Suit disappeared and he appeared naked.
Mohammed looked over at Bob then back at Jonathan and shook his head.
Sally from Marketing popped in. Her avatar was Minnie Mouse with excessively large breasts. Mohammed glanced at her and winked out.
“I wanted to go over the graphics on the Tangent hoverboard.” Sally said. “You said this was going to be really fast can we have it red with some flames on it.”
Yang looked at her. “You know we just want to get the last of the design right. Besides you know people are going to be able to get it quick fabbed in any style or color they want right?”
“It is going to be for the ad campaign. I swear you engineers know nothing about…”
The meeting room disappeared cutting off Sally’s last comment. I was back at my standing desk my glasses back in AR mode and the light back to normal. I lowered my desk and sat down. I pulled up the meeting link and tried going back in. A message just blinked back at me, “Meeting disabled by legal.”
Did I really need to be up for this? I guess not. May as well look over at other work. I Teams Ultimate message popped onto my glasses.
Singh, Mohammed: I apologize but I had to terminate today’s meeting due to gross IP violations. The Mickey Mouse Act of 2059 has added massive licensing restrictions to any Disney Properties. I will try and see if we can avoid terminating Sally however the legal exposure her avatar has caused may not be avoidable without her termination.
Johnathan I checked your IP license for your Stormtrooper appears to be in order, but please note it is close to its renewal period.
I will also note that while we have not had a policy on nudity in meetings it is not recommended, and Bob your photoshop is not fooling anyone.
Also to note that I am not exempt and my Star Trek uniform is properly licensed from ViacomCBSNetflix. You will all be receiving our AR/VR meeting guideline dress code. Please contact me with any questions.
Well, at least I can get back to doing real work I thought to myself as I took a sip from my coffee. I set down my cup and looked at the message on my cup. “I survived another meeting that should have been an email.” Yep, sometimes nothing changes.
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